Paralysed
by MaraudersChosenNerD
Summary: Crippled and disabled as she is after being tortured, the moment her fingers clutch those of Neville, she feels like she is giving birth to her baby all over again, but only, this time, in her mind.


**Disclaimer: The characters, back ground story and anything else you recognise belongs to Rowling.**

Alice looked at the chubby boy with blond hair and blue eyes, who entered the ward with Augusta. Something about the boy, made her mind go on high alert, telling her that she should know him. Every instinct she had, told her to hold the chubby, little toddler in her arms and never let go. Deciding to act on the instinct, she tried to move her legs and arms, as though moving towards the pair. But they wouldn't resond to her will, much as the past – well, she didn't know how long this had been going on. She'd been trapped in her mind for far too long, if you asked her, and all she could do was stare at the walls of the ward and Frank.

Frank was her husband, atleast according to Augusta. She wouldn't know, because she remembered nothing beyond a flash of blinding, white light, after which the first face she saw was that of a gray haired woman with a weird hat and emarald robes, with steely gray eyes peering at her. She had called herself Augusta Longbottom an tod Alice that she was her mother-in-law. At that point Alice hadn't even know she had a husband. She had made to open her mouth and ask Augusta who her husband waas, but no sound seemed to come out. That was the first time she'd come to realise her body wouldn't obey her mind. She remembered far too well, the panic that'd taken hold of her when she further realized that her limbs wouldn't co-operate either. Maybe her eyes reflected her panic, or Augusta had seemed to guess what was happening, because just then, she said in a soothing voice, "The healers seem to think that, after what happened," her voice seemed to crack at this point, but she continued nonetheless "I'm sorry dear, after what happened a few weeks ago, your parasympathetic nervous system seems to have shut itself off. Its only your sympathetic nerves helping you function."

None of this had made sense to Alice at the time, so she'd merely continued staring at the old lady. Augusta sighed, "Look at me rambling. I'm so sorry for what happened Alice. You don't know how shocked I was when the Ministry called in to explain what had happened, I don't think I've ever been that terrified in my entire life, and at such a time too, when we thought it was safe," she sniffled, "You don't know what a relief it is to see your warm blue eyes after nearly two months. I've been coming in everyday, leaving Nneville", she remembered thinking who Neville was, at that time, "with Algie, to check on your progress. The Healers say it is difficult to say how much of an improvement your nervous system will show, but Merlin, I'm just glad that you're alive."

At this point, Alice saw Augusta's hands reach towards her's, her eyes processing that her hand was in Augusta's, yet unable to feel the sensation. She'd known she would have to get used to this feeling, or rather the lack thereof. Augusta continued with misty eyes, and something had told Alice, that , that was not an expression Augusta usually dawned, "I promise you Alice, I'll try to look after your son, atleast half as good as you'd have. Neville still cries, asking for you. Though it is hard to understand with all the wailing." She barks out a half laugh and sighs," Oh, poor boy!" Augusta had then proceeded to show pictures of Neville, just for something to do, and it was at this point of her recollection that it hit Alice, that the chubby toddler in Augusta's arms was probably her son. Alice now remembers that Augusta had promised them last time, that she'd bring him at her next visit.

Alice remembers how, at that first visit, Augusta had gotten up, stooped down towards hers. Alice had lost sight of Augusta's face as it loomed over her forehead. She'd seen their still entangled hands and wished how she could somehow have made it known to Augusta that she appreciated everything. Just then Augusta's hand had left hers and she was gone, with a promise to be back in a day or two. And she'd kept that promise. Over time, the daily visits had beome weekly, but she never one misse an appointment. It'd probably beenn about five months since that first visit, and today Alice was finally getting to see her son, after hearing so much about him from Augusta.

This was perhaps the the first time their son was visiting them. Her thought in her mind pressed her, reminding her that she should be sharing this moment with Frank, her husband, with whom her only form of communication these past months, had been staring at ach other. She turned to look at Frank, only to find him already gazing at his mother and son with warm, brown eyes. It was in these moments, when she gazed at Frank and saw him lying there with a blank face, but warm,b rown eyes, that it hit her hard, how unresponsive she must look to the outside world, when in reality, thoughts ran rampant in her mind. She wished she knew what Frank was thinking, if only to know that she wasn't alone in this confusion that her life had bceome.

Augusta was now at the head of their beds, pulling up a chair to sit between them, with the toddler balanced on her lap. The toddler – Neville – seemed to be peeking shy glances at her and Frank from his position on his Grandmother's lap. Augusta turned to smile at Frank, "See Frank, I promised i would bring down your son, for my next visit." She then turned to Neville, "Look sharp, Neville, thats your mum and dad," she cooed, "Say hello, now. Come, come, wave at them." Baby Neville waved at them with his tiny, cute baby fingers, and Alice desperately wished she could clutch them to her heart and feel his soft skin in her fingers. And in that instant, aas though sensing his mother's wish, Neville leaned forward, making a grab at the linen spread on her cot. Not wanting to miss this opportunity, Alice channeled every nerve, every fibre in her body and willed her fingers to close the gap between their figers. And for the first time, in what was probably a very long time, sensation returned to her fingers, as she felt his smooth and pudgy fingers. They felt so warm, and nice, and soft, and smooth that she wished she'd never have to let them go. It felt like she'd just given birth to him all over again.

Just when she thought she never wanted to be separated from Neville again, a gasp pierced her reverie. Unwillingly, Alice looked up to see Augusta, wide-eyed and a look of shock plastered on her face. Before she could make sense of what was happening, Augusta had scooped up Neville in her arms and rushed out with a "I'll be right back". The woman was surprisingly agile for her age, Alice thought bitterly. Alice turned to Frank to see him already gazing at her, a twinkle in his eye. Just then, Augusta rushed in, with a Healer at her heels and Neville on her hip. Augusta waas talking at a rapid speed to the Healer, about something to do with fingers and movement. Her face was a combination of disbelief and ill-disguised hope, as her free hand clutched at her heart. The Healer seemd to be noting everything down, and then proceeded to take out the long wooden stick – a wand, she thoughtto herself – from the folds of his lime green robes and started muttering few words under his breath, moving it in complicated ways. A series of blue rays seemed to come out of the wand, and Alice had to suppress a mental wince, even though the rays did her no harm. She was a lot better at it than in the beginning, when the Healer had come in for a routine check up and pointed his wand at her. To any onlooker, she'd merely passed out, but her mind had gone into overdrive, genereating an urgent need to flee, which her body remained incapable of obeying. It was like she'd suffered worse things than one could imagine, coming from a wand. Of course it was a lot better now, she knew the Healer would not hurt her, and hence had learned to reign in her irrational mind.

Her thoughts came to halt when she felt a tugging snesation at her fingers and opened her eyes to see Neville sitting on her cot, seemingly content with playing with her fingers. She looked up to see Augusta smiliing at them whilel the Healer was going on about Alice's progress. At this point , his words were mere nonsense to Alice, though she caught the momentary flash of sadness os her eyes flicked towards Frank.

She then turned to look at Frank, still staring in her direction, but his eyes locked on Neville. Maybe it was her imagination, but Alice swore that the glint in Frank's eyes were brighter than ever, and his lips were turned up, just a little.

Maybe the Healer missed it, and maybe so did Augusta, but at the end of her visit, when Augusta picked up Baby Neville, and made to leave, promising to bring him back the next time too, Alice saw a tear trace its path across Frank's cheek as his eyes followed Neville.

And at that precise moment, when the tear fell Frank's face, Augusta made a silent promise to her son and daughter-in-law, standing in a corridor of St. Mungo's "I'll raise him right, Frank and Alice. I'll raise him to make you both proud." and left with an extra skip in her step that day.


End file.
